Dearest My Beloved BFFs

Dear BFFs,

I just wanted to write to you guys. I hope you'll read it. Even though not today but someday. I wrote this in English, but you can translate it if you get to read this and don't understand. I just want to say sorry to each and every one of you if I did something wrong or have hurt you in the past.

• To Dita :

I just want to say sorry if I've ever hurt your feelings and haven't been a great sister or best friend to you. I hope that you will forgive me for all the bad things I've done or probably words that I said that made you fell sad and disappointed in me. I care about you as my best friend and little sister. I think about you and what is best for you as well. I hope you understand my feelings towards you and I hope our friendship will be to the end of our life together. Love you ~

• To Nouvhi :

I just want to apologize for everything I've done to hurt you or even made you feel disappointed. Even though we misunderstand each other sometimes and get in to little fights, but we can never be angry at each other because we care to much about each other. I hope our friendship will last forever. Until our children can be best friends like us. Love you ~

• To Intan :

I'm sorry Intan, if I had hurt your feelings. I made you hate me and being angry at me. Fighting is always a cure to become good friends, that's what I've heard. I miss talking to you and joking around with you. Even though you don't like me or even treat me as your BFFs anymore, that's okay. I still care for you. I hope we can put our differences behind us and start a new page in our book of friendship. I still want us to be friends and I hate fighting and talking about each other behind each others back. I hope you will still forgive me. Friends Forever. Love you ~

• To April :

Even though I haven't met you in person, but I know you'll be my BFFs too. We get along so well even though it's only on facebook and twitter. But it feels like I knew you my whole life. I also want to say sorry if I ever hurt your feelings with my words. I hope we can be friends until we get old. Love you ~

Thank you BFFs for wanting to be my BFFs and want to get to know me. I hope we can all forgive each other for what we did in the past and make a new future ahead of us for our friendship. I forgive you all even though you hurt me on purpose or not. But I hope one day, we can understand our differences and become friends until we get old.

I'm sorry again if I've hurt your feelings in the past and for in the future. I just want to be honest, deep in my heart that I'm so sorry. I hope you'll forgive me.

Dearest Daddy

Dear Daddy,

It's been 4 months already I've lived with mama and it's been 4 months I haven't seen or spoke to you. Are you doing well? Are you happy I'm not there anymore? You seem not to care for me even though I live with mama. You never ask me how am I? As usual. Are you taking good care of my sister and brother? Are you as busy as always?

*If you are reading this*

Hope you are well. Be healthy and be a good dad to Caithlyn and Ethan. Be there for them if though you're busy. Make some time for your real family. Especially Caithlyn is going to graduate from Junior High next year. So please give her your support as a dad, not like you did to me. And Ethan, he's still little. He still needs love from you. Even though you give them money, they'll still wish you were there for them especially in important times. You still have time daddy to change. It's never too late to learn from your mistakes. That's what you always said to me. So you still have a chance to be a good dad to Caithlyn and Ethan, even though you weren't as great to me.

I've grown up, and starting my future with or without you. I hope I get your blessing through each path and step I make. Even though they're right and wrong. Thank you for taking care of me for the past 19 years of my life. Thank you even though you weren't a great dad to me but I still appreciate you as my dad.

Thank you daddy ~

I love you always and forever ~

Love always your daughter,

Jessica Ekarahayu Astra

Dearest Y.O.U

Dearest ex-BFF,

I always thought of you as my best friend. Not just a classmate, but a friend that I can relay on. Someone that I can trust with my secrets, a friend that I can talk to not being shy, just being myself, and a friend until we get old. But I guess I was wrong about you. You weren't my best friend at all. You really were good acting as my best friend but now I know who you really are.

*If you are reading this*

To be honest, I blocked you from my Facebook is not that I can't face you. It's not that I'm scared of you, it's because I'm tired of dealing with you. I'm tired reading your status that's for me (even though they're not for me, but from those words they're FOR me). It's not that NOW I'm NOT in BALI that I'm brave enough to talk about you behind your back or in the computer world, even though I still lived in BALI, I would still respect you as my BEST FRIEND! However you don't think that way. You think 100% differently than me. You get angry before finding the solution to solve both our differences and problems. Even though you act different in front and in the back of me, I treat you EQUALLY as my BEST FRIEND! Even though they're some things I don't like about you, but I try to like them. I try me best to be patience with you.

I really want to talk to you, but don't know what and how to talk to you. I even say happy birthday to you to be a good friend that I remembered your birthday, you make a status about me. Did you ever think that I care about you? Did you ever think that I could get hurt to by your words? Just to be honest with you, I care about you. You're my best friend. Best friends can get in fights. Best friends can forgive. Why can't you forgive me? I forgave you when you hurted me. I gave you so many chances. I opened my heart for you because I thought you were always someone special in my heart, you were always going to be there in my life. I never thought that our friendship would end just because of a stupid status.

If I ever hurted you in the past, forgive me. If you never want to meet me, write me, or even be friends with me, it's okay. I forgive you for every mistake you made to me. I hope you can change yourself for the better. Be a better person than before. 난 당신을 사랑한다 ex-BFF.

I've held this pain too long. I want to let it out now. Even though you'll never read this letter. But at least I wrote how I felt. One day, you'll read this and I hope you understand how I felt. Thank you for being my friend in the past and the best for you in the future. Hope to see you again :)

Love always,

Chicha Diksita